It sure has been awhile, I am not sure whether it is because I just don't want to blog anymore, or that I just have not been spending too much time at my computer or in/around the leggo site as much. I have mixed emotions about my whole poker career, whether or not I am on the slow decline into taking my life somewhere else, or too really go hard at this for an extended period of time.

I have become what you could call a "low stakes live pro"... playing 2/5 everyday in and around Las Vegas, seeing 25-30 hands an hour, pushing my edges, reading people and abusing their bad habits, and trying to grind out a living. I started out on a heater, making about $120/hour for a good chunk of time and thinking that I have completely adjusted to the live arena and will soon be able to move up to some great Bellagio 5/10.

Also I ran deep in a WSOP 1k event, finishing 29th for a decent chunk and feeling, although not great from losing a flip to bust, rather amazing, crushing and finally getting my bankroll to a more comfortable level to not have to worry about rent all the time. Cue the dark clouds moving in, a 4 day bender at the 2/5 games leaving me 5k less rich. Now, it's funny, I remember finally being able to handle bigger losing days online very well, sure I would be a little upset, but I would get over it and crush the next day. Live poker attacks my emotions so much harder though.

I am sitting at Aria, down 2.5k in one session at a tough table (for 2/5 anyway) and thinking to myself... I could flip this fucking table over, take chips, throw them at 50 mph directly at the dealer's face and punch the Norwegian player who stacked me earlier for a big pot. But I just sat there, my body overheating and my hands tapping the felt as I contemplate why the fuck I do this as my job, why the fuck I am sitting hear losing money and why the fuck online poker had to change. As I dumped my last $500 for the night resulting in a 3k loss I left the poker room in that fast paced fashion, ready to get as far away from that oxygen filled room as possible and into my hot tub to plunk myself under the 98 degree water and let out that scream I had built up inside from that night's session. Of course my hot tub closes at midnight. Fuck.

I took a shower, changed, got ready for bed, and finally was in a relaxed state... I had just live tilted my brains out. I literally laid in bed laughing at how I just acted, and realized that there's going to be another day, another old man, another Norwegian, and of course, another upswing. This all comes down to me trying to prove a point, and that is that if you are ever going to try and be a successful live player, emotional control is the biggest obstacle. If you are able to drop two buy-ins and continue playing your A-game, then you will succeed. If not, well...

So that's where I am at in live poker, trying to leave every session the same way I started, and to not let the sunglass wearing, short run gods that are the Las Vegas tourists ever twist my emotional state. If I can sustain this, I should get to 10/20 which I think is the goal for me. I want to at least taste those stakes, even if only for a month, don't call it a comeback.

Okay, back to non poker things. WSOP has brought out the whole poker world and has been producing great action throughout the city, and many friends of mine are here and it has been a great time. The LeggoPoker party was a couple nights ago and it was a blast. If you can get over the idea that a party will not have girls or midgets and go with an open mind, you'll always enjoy yourself with LP.

I have been trying to think of other things to do with my time. I have also been pretty unsuccessful with that.

VIDEO FROM MY ROOF WITH BELLAGIO FOUNTAINS
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jBdzSbnvcqw

Some pictures for you as always...


Pool at night...


Frontyard...


toocrispy, a kid with a dream...


Dawn...


Water level...


A means to an end...


XS...