AND I FUCKING DO MY BOLLOCKS!!!!!!!

Last nightI I still felt like aids, but seeing vicky made me feel a lot better she made me an awsome steak pie and mash for dinner then we headed to the comedy night. There were 3 acts and an introducer/host. He was hilarious. the main act, kent valentine was pretty good too, but as soon as he walked in some stupid woman heckled him about his hair (WTF?) and he was like this goes up in top 5 wierd starts. would be good to see how he leads off a gig where he gets on with it. He did a wicked annecdote about picking up a pram in london and ending up pretending to have a child in it for about 45 minutes on a train when a woman had helped him carry it down the stairs. And another about making napalm. Iv had a look for him on youtube, hes done over 1500 gigs but there isnt much footage which is a shame. Id strongly recomened to any of you to go to a comedy night its nice chilled out evening which completely takes your mind off poker.

Now to business. In my last blog I mention the 'local private cash tables online'. These have been ridicilous and are a definate +ev for my bankroll. I know every player inside out. and whilst they are a collection of the better regulars I play with they are recreational. Except roberto whos a FT pro. On the first session 3 weeks ago I played 2/4NHL and 2/4PLO. I finished even off holdem after running a little below ev. Omaha was ridicilous. Marko was in for 5300 and somehow got it all back pretty sure pots like this help the fucker!

$2/$4 Pot Limit Omaha Hi
iPoker
7 Players
Hand Conversion Powered by weaktight.com

Stacks:
UTG 80raff ($205)
UTG+1 allivnotsa ($1,083.37)
MP welshhoover ($1,037.72)
CO markoclare2 ($400)
BTN vegasfire ($929.36)
SB donkhoover ($2,161.98)
BB mickeymouse2009 ($76)

Pre-Flop: ($8, 7 players)
[markoclare2 posts $2]
80raff calls $4, allivnotsa raises to $20, welshhoover calls $20, markoclare2 raises to $90, 3 folds, 80raff folds, allivnotsa calls $70, welshhoover calls $70

Flop: 9 A 7 ($282, 3 players)
allivnotsa bets $280, welshhoover folds, markoclare2 goes all-in $310, allivnotsa calls $30

Turn: Q ($902, 2 players, 1 all-in)

River: 3 ($902, 2 players, 1 all-in)

Final Pot: $897
allivnotsa shows
10 6 5 8
markoclare2 shows
J Q 3 6

markoclare2 wins $897 (net +$497)

80raff lost $4
allivnotsa lost $400
welshhoover lost $90

Just to reiterate he has QJ63 on a rainbow A97 flop. I dont see how he can fold?

Then this got me out of trouble and into the good $$$
$2/$4 Pot Limit Omaha Hi
iPoker
4 Players
Hand Conversion Powered by weaktight.com

Stacks:
CO markoclare2 ($3,256.45)
BTN vegasfire ($762.02)
SB donkhoover ($3,468.09)
BB allivnotsa ($1,207.27)

Pre-Flop: ($6, 4 players)
markoclare2 calls $4, vegasfire calls $4, donkhoover calls $2, allivnotsa raises to $8, markoclare2 calls $4, vegasfire calls $4, donkhoover raises to $12, allivnotsa raises to $16, markoclare2 calls $8, vegasfire raises to $20, donkhoover raises to $24, allivnotsa raises to $28, markoclare2 calls $12, vegasfire raises to $32, donkhoover raises to $36, allivnotsa raises to $40, markoclare2 calls $12, vegasfire raises to $44, donkhoover raises to $48, allivnotsa calls $8, markoclare2 calls $8, vegasfire raises to $52, donkhoover raises to $56, allivnotsa calls $8, markoclare2 calls $8, vegasfire raises to $60, donkhoover raises to $64, allivnotsa raises to $68, markoclare2 raises to $280, vegasfire goes all-in $762.02, donkhoover raises to $2,578.06, allivnotsa goes all-in $1,139.27, markoclare2 folds

Flop: 4 A 2 ($5,455.35, 3 players, 2 all-in)

Turn: 6 ($5,455.35, 3 players, 2 all-in)

River: 10 ($5,455.35, 3 players, 2 all-in)

Final Pot: $4,825.35
allivnotsa shows
6 8 5 7
vegasfire shows
8 J 9 J
donkhoover shows
A 9 6 A

allivnotsa wins $3,454.56 (net +$2,247.29)

donkhoover collects $1,370.79 (net -$1,207.27)
markoclare2 lost $280
vegasfire lost $762.02

Shortly after the game beraks I take ~$500 off marko in 1/2 hr of HU.

So just as I was leaving for the club tonight my housemate asks about the cash game I say he can play on my account. no loss 50% of wins, but dont take the piss. come 11pm im home with vicky and hes winning 600 on 1/2NLH. I encourage a flip with 66 for $80 he loses. Vicks leaves about 12 cause she lives half hr away and has a meeting in the morning an extra 1/2 hr away from hers.
So I sit in. at this point marko is moving all in every flop. he has AA cracked by K 10, HEM has him as being stuck 7 buyins. I get Ak utg and raise to 6. this happens. slav says dont gamble with him man theres no need.
this happens..
$1/$2 No Limit Holdem
iPoker
5 Players
Hand Conversion Powered by weaktight.com

Stacks:
UTG Hero ($733.05)
CO welshhoover ($836.98)
BTN xAdamxxFrancisx ($647.05)
SB mickeymouse2009 ($127.80)
BB markoclare2 ($229)

Pre-Flop: ($3, 5 players) Hero is UTG K A
Hero raises to $6, 1 fold, xAdamxxFrancisx calls $6, 1 fold, markoclare2 goes all-in $229, Hero goes all-in $733.05, xAdamxxFrancisx folds

Flop: 9 6 Q ($969.05, 2 players, 2 all-in)

Turn: 10 ($969.05, 2 players, 2 all-in)

River: 2 ($969.05, 2 players, 2 all-in)

Final Pot: $969.05
markoclare2 shows
A A

markoclare2 wins $462 (net +$233)

Hero collects $504.05 (net -$229.00)
xAdamxxFrancisx lost $6
he had aces three times in 2 cyles FML.

Now this happens. Sweet.

$1/$2 No Limit Holdem
iPoker
5 Players
Hand Conversion Powered by weaktight.com

Stacks:
UTG Hero ($521.05)
CO welshhoover ($833.98)
BTN xAdamxxFrancisx ($637.05)
SB mickeymouse2009 ($124.80)
BB markoclare2 ($452)

Pre-Flop: ($3, 5 players) Hero is UTG A Q
Hero calls $2, welshhoover calls $2, 2 folds, markoclare2 goes all-in $452, Hero goes all-in $521.05, welshhoover folds

Flop: J 7 K ($976.05, 2 players, 2 all-in)

Turn: 2 ($976.05, 2 players, 2 all-in)

River: 9 ($976.05, 2 players, 2 all-in)

Final Pot: $976.05
markoclare2 shows
A J

markoclare2 wins $904 (net +$452)

Hero collects $69.05 (net -$452.00)
welshhoover lost $2

then this. bare in mind i know every players game inside out on this table. except marko as he is my trickiest customer. definately in a different class to the others but when he gets the mist between his eyes theres no stopping him.

I first want to shove as adam whilst generally soild does pick some horrible spots to try it on. I figure a raise like this when Iv had 3/4 callers is AJ- 1010- as he wouldn't fuck around with better. So i do the honourable thing. I wanted to shove but I know hes stubborn and wont fold pre after 3 betting unless he has to commit a serious stack, on reflection maybe he passes for 300ish but its too close to say for sure.( i asked him tonight he said hed call) so I elect to take a flop and If an A drops I save myself money. He shoves I dont think he has the K as hed get it in pre with AK, and he doesnt value KQ enough to call the 4bet. Fortunately I read the situation well and hed the binked that pesky 7.
$1/$2 No Limit Holdem
iPoker
8 Players
Hand Conversion Powered by weaktight.com

Stacks:
UTG mickeymouse2009 ($145.10)
UTG+1 arrivanetwork ($105.10)
MP1 markoclare2 ($841.80)
MP2 Hero ($334.80)
CO welshhoover ($751.58)
BTN vegasfire ($29.30)
SB bibbsy1972 ($150)
BB xAdamxxFrancisx ($571.65)

Pre-Flop: ($3, 8 players) Hero is MP2 J J
1 fold, arrivanetwork calls $2, markoclare2 calls $2, Hero raises to $11, welshhoover calls $11, vegasfire calls $11, 1 fold, xAdamxxFrancisx raises to $40, arrivanetwork folds, markoclare2 folds, Hero raises to $127, welshhoover folds, vegasfire calls $18.30, xAdamxxFrancisx calls $87

Flop: 8 7 K ($299.30, 3 players)
xAdamxxFrancisx bets $299.30, Hero calls $207.80

Turn: A ($806.40, 3 players)

River: Q ($806.40, 3 players)

Final Pot: $806.40
vegasfire shows
A 3
xAdamxxFrancisx shows
7 7

xAdamxxFrancisx wins $803.40 (net +$377.10)

Hero lost $334.80
welshhoover lost $11
vegasfire lost $29.30
arrivanetwork lost $2
markoclare2 lost $2

I got one back on him and believe me its been years since Iv managed to get him. He runs so good its untrue lol. It was fucking awesome. I didnt shove to take him off the hand. I wanted him to have AA and crack them and make his head spin. Live he has excellent money management and is never in deep. but if hes got money in his account online and i can get him reloading its game on.

$1/$2 No Limit Holdem
iPoker
7 Players
Hand Conversion Powered by weaktight.com

Stacks:
UTG mickeymouse2009 ($181.50)
UTG+1 arrivanetwork ($204.20)
MP markoclare2 ($812.40)
CO Hero ($249)
BTN welshhoover ($815.73)
SB bibbsy1972 ($168.60)
BB xAdamxxFrancisx ($950.95)

Pre-Flop: ($6, 7 players) Hero is CO 7 2
[Hero posts $3]
3 folds, Hero raises to $9, welshhoover calls $8, bibbsy1972 calls $7, xAdamxxFrancisx raises to $50, Hero goes all-in $249, welshhoover folds, bibbsy1972 calls $160.60, xAdamxxFrancisx calls $198

Flop: 2 A 3 ($673.60, 3 players, 1 all-in)

Turn: J ($673.60, 3 players, 1 all-in)

River: 2 ($673.60, 3 players, 1 all-in)

Final Pot: $673.60
bibbsy1972 shows
A K
xAdamxxFrancisx shows
Q A

Hero wins $670.60 (net +$421.60)

welshhoover lost $8
bibbsy1972 lost $168.60
xAdamxxFrancisx lost $248

The shove is fruitful and his head goes unfortunatley he has the last laugh.(s)

Before the next bout of sickness. This is the worst spew Iv made all month. I feel like Id be telling a lie by about the session by ommiting this. I could have taken a different (and better) line on every street. TBH im pretty ashamed/embarassed but like I said I want to start being accountable for what I do so its time to man up.
On the flop I know he will call whatever i bet if he had any pair. and his range is so wide that any turn other than a J is dangerous. I think I should overbet the pot on the flop and as soon as I bet pot I knew id made a mistake. So i try to counteract on next street but its too late. I should of course 100% fold for the last 300. He sits out after the hand. Im disgusted by this. He a rich guy. the money doesnt mean anything to him i.e he span up 15k playing plo last week and then played 1k a hand on the online blackjack and did the lot. and hes still playing on the hilow table. Ive discussed this hand with my housemate and we feel i could even shove here and hed call. Id definately prefer to get a beat than put my money in dead. Especially when hes basically said keep that $293.10 if you can stop your right finger mashing the left mouse button. Actually see hand #2 i should just make it 20BB minuimum PF. If this hand was live I would raise to about £50 playin 1/1 expecting a minumum of 1 caller shorthanded. 3-4 in full ring. Thats how lose the games are atm.

$1/$2 No Limit Holdem
iPoker
4 Players
Hand Conversion Powered by weaktight.com

Stacks:
CO markoclare2 ($765.75)
BTN Hero ($475.10)
SB welshhoover ($1,137.73)
BB xAdamxxFrancisx ($745.95)

Pre-Flop: ($3, 4 players) Hero is BTN J J
markoclare2 calls $2, Hero raises to $9, 2 folds, markoclare2 calls $7

Flop: 5 4 8 ($21, 2 players)
markoclare2 checks, Hero bets $21, markoclare2 calls $21

Turn: 2 ($63, 2 players)
markoclare2 checks, Hero bets $152, markoclare2 goes all-in $735.75, Hero calls $293.10

River: 9 ($1,243.85, 2 players, 1 all-in)

Final Pot: $1,243.85
markoclare2 shows
3 6

markoclare2 wins $1,241.85 (net +$476.10)

Hero lost $475.10

#2 slav did this before i got here

$1/$2 No Limit Holdem
iPoker
5 Players
Hand Conversion Powered by weaktight.com

Stacks:
UTG welshhoover ($137)
CO xAdamxxFrancisx ($200.90)
BTN THEG0BBLER ($318.83)
SB markoclare2 ($208)
BB Hero ($491.55)

Pre-Flop: ($3, 5 players) Hero is BB A A
3 folds, markoclare2 calls $1, Hero raises to $30, markoclare2 goes all-in $208, Hero calls $178

Flop: 9 7 K ($416, 2 players, 1 all-in)

Turn: 5 ($416, 2 players, 1 all-in)

River: 3 ($416, 2 players, 1 all-in)

Final Pot: $416
markoclare2 shows
3 A

Hero wins $413 (net +$205)

markoclare2 lost $208
adam picks another bad spot to get frisky, especially when he should really think that im on tilt.

$1/$2 No Limit Holdem
iPoker
3 Players
Hand Conversion Powered by weaktight.com

Stacks:
BTN Hero ($240)
SB welshhoover ($1,637.93)
BB xAdamxxFrancisx ($427.55)

Pre-Flop: ($3, 3 players) Hero is BTN 9 K
Hero raises to $12, welshhoover calls $11, xAdamxxFrancisx calls $10

Flop: 9 K 2 ($36, 3 players)
welshhoover checks, xAdamxxFrancisx checks, Hero bets $22, welshhoover folds, xAdamxxFrancisx calls $22

Turn: 6 ($80, 2 players)
xAdamxxFrancisx checks, Hero bets $80, xAdamxxFrancisx calls $80

River: 2 ($240, 2 players)
xAdamxxFrancisx bets $313.55, Hero calls $126

Final Pot: $679.55
xAdamxxFrancisx shows
10 A

Hero wins $490 (net +$250)

xAdamxxFrancisx collects $187.55 (net -$240)
welshhoover lost $12

Now he decides that normal service has been resumed with these gems.
#1

$1/$2 No Limit Holdem
iPoker
3 Players
Hand Conversion Powered by weaktight.com

Stacks:
BTN Hero ($219.60)
SB welshhoover ($1,673.23)
BB xAdamxxFrancisx ($176.95)

Pre-Flop: ($3, 3 players) Hero is BTN A 8
Hero raises to $10, welshhoover calls $9, xAdamxxFrancisx goes all-in $176.95, Hero goes all-in $219.60, welshhoover folds

Flop: 7 7 3 ($406.55, 2 players, 2 all-in)

Turn: 6 ($406.55, 2 players, 2 all-in)

River: K ($406.55, 2 players, 2 all-in)

Final Pot: $406.55
xAdamxxFrancisx shows
J 6

xAdamxxFrancisx wins $361.90 (net +$184.95)

Hero collects $42.65 (net -$176.95)
welshhoover lost $10

#2

$1/$2 No Limit Holdem
iPoker
3 Players
Hand Conversion Powered by weaktight.com

Stacks:
BTN welshhoover ($1,825.23)
SB xAdamxxFrancisx ($127.95)
BB Hero ($337.40)

Pre-Flop: ($3, 3 players) Hero is BB 3 A
welshhoover folds, xAdamxxFrancisx calls $1, Hero goes all-in $337.40, xAdamxxFrancisx calls $125.95

Flop: 5 9 J ($465.35, 2 players, 1 all-in)

Turn: 8 ($465.35, 2 players, 1 all-in)

River: Q ($465.35, 2 players, 1 all-in)

Final Pot: $465.35
xAdamxxFrancisx shows
8 3

xAdamxxFrancisx wins $253.90 (net +$125.95)

Hero collects $209.45 (net -$127.95)

So I finish this session down $1200 on nlh and oweing slav £120 and I lost 300 on hilow when I flopped top 2 turned nut strt and lost to BDF. TBF he did have aces which is like nuts on the flop in a 4 way pot lolz.
As you can guess Im pretty pissed off. I cant sustain this kind of a loss regularly and Ive had 3 sessions like this now this month. Like I said Im an internet poker retard. I think ill have to take auto rebuy off to slow myself down after losing a buyin.
Could someone help me install a stop loss please?