I had a bunch of my friends over last night to celebrate Leggo's B-Day. I originally wanted to my first blog post after the 17th to be a year in review of sorts, but I have the urge to write about this topic instead. I am sure there will be plenty of references, anyway.
So I ordered a birthday cake for the party, and when I brought it out to serve to the guests I decided to say an impromptu thank you to my roommates of last year. I told each of them individually (3 of them) how they were helpful in the start up of Leggo, and how they were good friends to me throughout.
When I spoke last year in front of some class at Wake (I had been invited to speak and share my thoughts about owning a business), I was actually on a panel of 3, with the other two "entrepreneurs" being complete jokes; the first one's business consisted of selling homemade postcards door to door at Wake Forest dorms and the other's was raising awareness about low-grade water in her home town. I mean no disrespect to these girls, but that's not quite in the same league (although, I am taught in one of my classes that whenever you say the word "but" you actually mean nothing before it and everything after it
). So naturally, most of the questions were directed at me.
One student asked me how difficult it was to start a business, and, in addition to replying with the historically physically difficult angle, I made it a point to emphasize how mentally draining it was. How you have a vision and there are roughly 600 reasons why that is not going to happen, and you wish you could clone 100 of you and get it done because no one could ever (and rightfully so) understand exactly what goes on in your head as good as you. I talked about how a million hurdles constantly arise and you must clear them and continue running at full speed (or hit them, fall, and then get up and keep running very quickly). I talked about how this affects you mentally and emotionally -- I was sharper with my roommates, and they very realistically had to "tolerate" me due to something that was completely out of their hands. So, in addition to offering their opinions and fields of expertize, they suffered from the stress *I* was under. Hardly fair, right?
As I was complimenting my roommates yesterday, I flashed back to a scene I will never forget. It was early in the spring semester of '08, and I had made the decision to withdraw from school until the overbearing workload of Leggo + everything else could be tamed. We were going out to a last supper of sorts, and my three roommates were downstairs while I was upstairs taking everything in. In the emotionally overwhelming moment, I started to cry (as I write this, I am sure my eyes will start to tear up any second now...). I slid into the kitchen hoping to regain control before my roommates came upstairs, but of course that didn't happen. They showed up and there I stood, with water-filled eyes and tributaries of tears running down my cheeks. I looked at them blankly for a moment, and then said "Guys, I'm sad," and continued to cry. Craig, saying nothing, walked up to me and gave me a big hug. Kyle and Reid then followed with a caring pat on my back.
It was a moment of true beauty, and one of epiphany. This is what friendship is about. It's about 4 guys who's physical interaction in the previous 3 years had been high fives and bro-hugs coming together for a group hug. It's about me telling them "I am vulnerable" and, without a single word spoken, their response of: "it's ok to be vulnerable in front of us."
As I continued to speak about friendship, I saw a few heads silently nodding in agreement. Your friends shape you, and are invaluable as a support group. Conveniently, being a good friend yourself is one of the most rewarding things out there. Seems like a win-win to me.
Greg
