One would think that I would be one of the happiest poker players in the game at this time after resurrecting a microbankroll for a third time into one sufficient enough to play the highest stakes online. I more or less expected such a feat, but after years of degeneracy I think nothing really excites me anymore. I feel more fulfilled being with my parents, sisters, and Lauren. Lately I've been just moping around and I haven't been able to do anything because I've having intense back spasms. Not training for a week really through off my sleep schedule and it makes me feel terrible. I haven't been functioning at all lately, I can't do simple tasks like talk on the phone, respond to PMs, or text messages. I feel so pathetic, but I believe it's just a phase.
In 2 weeks I'm going up North again which means that I will only see those people mentioned a couple times the next 10 months. It's so tough for me to accept what is from what I want because of my desire to do so. I'm dreading the day I leave and pretty much everyday after that until I come home. it's got to be this way though, otherwise gambling will pretty much consume me until I made a drastic change. This gives me a chance to find a new passion which lately has been real estate and the idea of buying and selling property for a living. The concept of weighing options and quantifying values is obviously something I have talent at and I'm interested in. I'm not sure if I'll learn a whole lot on the subject with the courses I'm taking, but I would definately learn a ton at a University which is the plan for the following years.
I have a decision to make in regards to gambling and wrestling. It seems to me that the only way I could be the very best I could be and potentially being an All-American would be to stop playing poker for 7 months. I have decide what I want more and it really only comes down to that. Obviously it's very crucial that I'm getting all of my work done and I actually apply myself so I'm learning stuff. If I want to be any type of serious wrestler, I would to dvote every second into sleeping enough, running, lifting, drilling, watching video, mental exercises, dieting, and technique. There's nothing crazy about spending every hour of everyday that I'm not sleeping or doing school, to devote to becoming a better wrestler. Obviously it's easier said than done, but I know I'm capable of this. I know I am.
Aaron decided that it was not a good idea to leave the audio blog of my Vegas adventures up. I honestly don't care and I really don't think I'm going to get in trouble or that a person who could get me in trouble would listen to that. For the record, I was using a backup mic and my voice gets out of whack when I'm tired and my throat is dry. It sounds completely fine most of the time, but it did sound awkward on that day. I wish I had the motivation to right more, but it takes a special occasion in these days for me to put the time, effort, and creativity into something. I think I'll save my poker results for another time, but lets just say I've been winning.
