Writing this at 6 am in the morning after a rhino trip with Brandon Crawford, a guy named Nick, and a female live pro named Suzie. I met Suzie just today and she was telling me her records for the summer in the $5/5 plo games. She's said she has grinded 200 hours this month and is making $200 an hour. She bragged about her discipline and her knowledge and understanding of the game. What I really appreciated about her conversation was that she had never heard of me before and had no idea of my experience or winnings at plo. I appreciated our interaction that much more because of this. Basically, she said I was horrible. If she knew me better I think she would have called me a monktard.

I've been losing. Your frustration from losing is a function of your ego. The bigger your ego is, the more you think you expect and deserve to win and the less open-minded you are to improving. Conversely, the more humble you are, the more you try to identify reality and the truth. In poker, the truth is equivalent to winning. If you knew the right answer to every decision possible, you have won. Of course the ego hinders you from identifying the truth and as a result you lose. The worst part for the egomaniac is that his arrogance is too much to overcome and for a poker player this leads him to bust or near bust. Sadly, it's a natural cycle and the ego forces this cycle to occur.

Of course, my career has been nothing less than this natural cycle. When every source that you know is telling you that you are the best, that you have utmost confidence and ability, that you will find a way to win, that losing isn't an option, that you can't accept defeat, then you are defeated. Some things just can't be won, nor should they have attempted to be beat. Winners let go, they are free. Their ego isn't driving them into oblivion. It's the hardest part about the game to understand.
Again, I've been losing. I've wanted what was once mine. I want what isn't mine. Getting back to the peak is an illusion of glory, plastic surgery to the soul, not a cure but a bandaid. The ego has made sacrifices to the well-being of the person to relieve it's pain and to continue to grow. Will power is the ability to overcome a certain expectation with strength and understanding of the truth. The further your results are from expectation, the more your ego is affected and your knowledge of the truth is also negatively affected. It's taken years of pain and an ego-driven agenda that has buried me to realize this. There is no escape route for the ignorant.

To summarize my career into one sentence, I had phenomenal poker results(see below), but my ego prevented me from holding onto money and I extremely negative results was the price that I paid.

all-time NLH


all-time PLO


Ego decides I can beat mixed games, chinese, backgammon, staking, sports-betting. poof.

P.S. Sorry about the wait and for how boring this is.

P.P.S. I lost a lot of money doing dumb shit. Be smart.

P.P.P.S. I'm coaching NLH and PLO. PM me.