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BigCheesy · #1 (**permalink**) 12-21-2009, 01:58 PM

i had a sick twist of fate today - lost connection just before final table on the 50+5 75k gtd on stars after griding for 8hours to 7A.M. local time, being 8/10 and ended up blinding away at 10th for $950, with first place being $19k+. DAMN IT!

(kinda blog post below cuz I don't have a blog, so if you’re not interesting in the ramblings of a small stakes grinder you can skip everything below)

Now... I really get emotionally attached to tourneys. I play them pretty rarely, but I really focus on when I know that I will play tourneys, usually trying to relax before and be in the A-game mood. In Europe the good tourneys start at 10P.M. the earliest, so it's a whole night of degenerate gambling if you go deep.

It’s been kinda rough day, with me getting angry on myself for this and that, so I was like “fuck ‘em bitches, I’m gonna make some monies today” and entered some tourneys like mini-ftops ME with 15k people and 600k gtd and bunch of others, including that 75k gtd on stars. I rarely play MTT’s so these were one of the biggest ones I’ve ever entered. And there goes my whole night, the two major tourneys starting at 0:00 local time and some food besides me and an adventurous mood. I think I played pretty well and although I busted quickly from the smaller tourneys, I was doing pretty well at the others, especially after I sucked out with overpair against a set in a 3way pot. I’m griding for 7h straight and I’m pretty deep, then busted out right at the bubble of ftops and focused entirely on the 75k gtd on stars. I’m obviously pretty card dead, but manage to maintain ~20bb stack mainly from squeezing overly aggro guys and very rarely by having hands. And now we’re on break, I’m like 12/13 or so and there starts another hour.. now only 10 people left, I’m just ~16bb, but I feel in pretty good shape, knowing the other guys at the table are not risk happy and I’m really aggro late in tourneys…

BOOM! The thing that happens at most once in a month happens RIGHT NOW - connection lost, I’m cursing the gods and obviously get the first item at hand and throw it at the wall. Seconds after that I realize that I just broke my mobile phone and all bunch of stuff jump right out of it. But I go and try to make a phone call with the pieces in it that are connected and it somehow worked. I phoned my brother, who knows better about such problems… no answer. I then call my internet provider and they are so slow with all that fucking melodies and it’s probably cuz of my broken phone but I have to repeat every sentence 3 times before they hear me… obv they say stuff happens, go check this, bla bla bla, I went to reset my router and making a phone call to the closest living friend of mine that can help me. I check back my PC, same shit. My friend’s obviously sick this day and also very sleepy so he answers in like five minutes, I’m probably already at 10bb blinding away, but there’s some hope… No, his PC is off so I have to wait it for some more precious time and I tell him my username/pass and he tells me he can’t enter, I told him letter by letter, still nothing and I see that already about 15 minutes have passed, so I’m like “fuck it dude, forget about it, it’s all over”. I’m standing in the middle of the room, still, looking exactly as if I’m hit by a cold towel!

Now…how is this possible? I’ve waited for so long for a moment like this, was in a rough downer last month and now that I’m in the perfect mood, fine with myself and my emotions, I get such total crap right in my face.

I can bitch and moan the whole day about this, go cry like a little girl, but what I really believe is that things that happen to us have a meaning. Nothing in life is “fair” in our terms of understanding the word, it’s just the way it is, so the only way to move forward is to get over it/get used to it and come stronger. It’s just a sign, I was probably not ready to win them monies, I have to believe more in my skills and understand that poker is actually something I do because I enjoy, not because I’m obliged to do to win money.

Nothing is fair guys, but nothing is accidental. I know that I can only become a better player and a better person from now on.

Special thanks to Matt, who was about to watch me crush the final table had this not happened.

tedjam · #2 (**permalink**) 12-21-2009, 07:33 PM

bad luck man thats hard to take.

Probability · #3 (**permalink**) 12-21-2009, 08:21 PM

sucks dude

RikaKazak · #4 (**permalink**) 12-23-2009, 05:39 PM

2 years ago I played a 4K man MTT...was 2nd in chips, internet went out with 14 left...I got 12th

Sucks dude

Maximus13 · #5 (**permalink**) 12-28-2009, 01:47 AM

Sorry to hear dude, major bummer... that is just brutal.

cards12783 · #6 (**permalink**) 12-29-2009, 01:10 AM

this is why im making the switch to cash.. when u play strictly mtts' ur a prisoner to the tourneys.. no gym, no wife, no friends.. cant do shit except take a piss during ur 5 min break.. u leave when u want... got demoralized from the structure of mtts

Vitas23 · #7 (**permalink**) 12-29-2009, 10:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cards12783

when u play strictly mtts' ur a prisoner to the tourneys

this is so true.

BigCheesy · #8 (**permalink**) 12-30-2009, 06:12 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cards12783

this is why im making the switch to cash.. when u play strictly mtts' ur a prisoner to the tourneys.. no gym, no wife, no friends.. cant do shit except take a piss during ur 5 min break.. u leave when u want... got demoralized from the structure of mtts

so true, i also can't imagine playing tourneys for a living, but they are a cool switch of pace and it's way more exciting when you go deep